The Blog From Hell

Okay, so I couldn't resist a horrible pun in the title – but well, I had something to write about and it almost fitted !  On Saturday me and Caryn went to Nadine Larter's booklaunch in Cape Town. As most people begun to leave we were chatting with her and another girl who had also hung around later. At some point as my name was mentioned she said "Wait, you're A.J. Venter ?", I confirmed this and then she said: "I read your blog all the time and I love your stories" (I am paraphrasing, i may not have the words exactly right but the meaning is essentially right).

We spent the next long while chatting about stories and blogging and what we're working on and her discussing what she loved about the female lead in erotic story "The fallen lamb". It was quite a moving experience. When, as a writer, you spend most of your time working on a blog that doesn't get many comments and writing stories that few people talk about reading unless they are already close friends, you sometimes find yourself wondering if anybody ever reads the things you type out there. If you're actually making any difference, if anybody notices your work – and if maybe you're just a pathetic hack who needs to get a life.

But occasionally you meet somebody who does value your work, who appreciates what you're trying to say. On those days you realize that what you do is meaningful, and has meaning for others – even if you often don't hear from them. I must honestly confess there is nothing more inspiring to a writer, than the knowledge that you are read. 

So thanks Amanda for that fortuitous meeting, I thought it deserved a mention here.

Continuing the story series I began in "Uniondale" I am happy to announce the now public availability of "Thief in the night". This second story in the episodic Anderson Files series pits our heroes against a monster that makes their last ghostly encounter seem like a picnic while we also get to learn quite a bit about Karen's past.

I really enjoyed this story – more than the first actually – as I had the basic introductions out of the way and could really start to work on character development. This time I focused that development primarily on Karen but in the next story  the focus will shift a bit to Pieter's past and what makes him tick. 

I've already begun research for File 3 which will be titled "Heavy Metal" – and I'm not giving away anything else yet. Once again – my grateful thanks to the early readers who helped me with editorial advice, comments and suggestions. The stories would be far worse without your contributions.

In the meantime – I hope you all enjoy "Thief in the night" and as always I welcome all comments, reviews and suggestions. Ready to read it ? Well here is the link.

After careful consideration I decided not to write this post. The two most obvious candidates are both ruled out in my mind for good (but different) reasons. One because she honestly believes I hurt her on purpose and I have no desire to rub salt in wounds I never wanted to create, the other because quite frankly I have written about her too many times on this blog already and she's in the past – it just doesn't matter anymore.

Dear astronaught, rockstar, benevolent dictator, bestselling author and famous actor.

Yes, in my dreams I have been all of you. I am also aware that I will almost certainly never actually be any of you. I won't be an astronaught as I was born in the wrong country and hold the wrong beliefs [sorry but if the route to space is through the military then the price is too great]. I won't be a rockstar because even though I play a bit of drums and write some good songs – I am too old and not focused enough, I may at best be an occasional musician.

I won't be a famous actor because I don't have the looks and frankly when I was at the point in my life where I should have pursued it, I didn't. I won't be a benevolent dictator of a great country because deep in my heart I know that power corrupts. Even if I get it and use it for good -eventually I would succumb to the seduction of abusing it. I won't won't be a bestselling author because I am just not focused enough on writing. I have started quite a few novels and never finished one. i've written many short stories and poems and I am good at those – but at least in part that skill comes from them not taking that much time. A truly good author has to make it a career. The effort in a good book takes many hours a day, every day for months or years. I simply don't see myself ever putting in that kind of effort into one activity without getting distracted (and going broke).

In short you are all the people that I may have been in another world, in another life. Instead I'm me. I'm all of you a little bit, and none of you completely. What you all have in common though is that those who get you put absolutely everything at stake to make it. That they risk it all, wholeheartedly and for everyone whom it pays off for – a thousand fail and lose everything.

The truth is I haven't given up on you – I have made a decision that there are things in my life too valuable to risk. My lady, my home, my life. I can't take the chance of losing those to become you, so I am content to keep them safe and let you all live on in my fantasies and daydreams. 

We all need our little escapes sometimes, I feel almost blessed that I can escape into any of you by simply letting my mind go there. Imagination, that is my most precious mental gift. The intelligence I claim to boast is really just the same thing-  imagination with a little bit of logical direction -and it comes with a bonus. Just by letting myself -I can be any of you, all of you, whenever I need to be.

When real life has the type of things mine does, only being you in my dreams is enough and when you add it all up – that is exceptional. 

Regards

The mundane you with the dayjob.